This blog is an extension of the ideas presented in my book (Haiku Notebook Second Edition, smashwords.com, 2010). It is intended to be a forum for discussing haiku and haibun. My hope as an educator is to stimulate interest in writing these forms. So, please feel free to post. [NOTE: click "comments" to read poems by other poets, as well as discussion]. Thank you for visiting!
Over 75 thousand Zazzle Fine Art Photography Products!
DrBillCreations⬅︎ Check out over 75 thousand of my photography products at my Zazzle store!Writing haiku is like capturing a moment in time. Capturing life in photographs has a family resemblance. Please check out my photography sites!
I like the image a lot. And I really like the rhythm and the sound of the first five words. One could almost stop the poem there: "summer comes the honeybee clings". Or is that becoming too minimal? Probably so.
Thanks for the comment. Funny you should suggest shortening the poem even more, as I am known to be a minimalist. I do think there needs to be an object here though. Clinging, per se, could mean to a flower or anything. I guess I wanted to stay true to what happened. Also, I wanted to keep myself (or any human-- I could have written "his shirt" or "her") in the image to bring up our wanting to keep spring here, rather than the excessive heat of summer. Anyway, those are my thoughts. Thanks again.
2 comments:
I like the image a lot. And I really like the rhythm and the sound of the first five words. One could almost stop the poem there: "summer comes the honeybee clings". Or is that becoming too minimal? Probably so.
A lovely piece.
Grant
Hi Grant,
Thanks for the comment. Funny you should
suggest shortening the poem even more, as I
am known to be a minimalist. I do think there
needs to be an object here though. Clinging,
per se, could mean to a flower or anything.
I guess I wanted to stay true to what happened.
Also, I wanted to keep myself (or any human--
I could have written "his shirt" or "her") in the
image to bring up our wanting to keep spring
here, rather than the excessive heat of summer.
Anyway, those are my thoughts. Thanks again.
Bill
Post a Comment